Title

beefmilk2:

pansoph:

for chinese new year they get all these famous actors and comedians together and they do a lil show and one of the comedians was like “i was in a hotel in america once and there was a mouse in my room so i called reception except i forgot the english word for mouse so instead i said ‘you know tom and jerry? jerry is here’

jerry is here

person: OMG YOU DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE TEST???!?!?!
me: nope
person: BUT HOW ARE YOU GONNA PASS???
me: i'm not
lessmetamorebeta:

GOLLY FUCKING GOSH WHAT A NICE DAY FOR SURFING!

lessmetamorebeta:

GOLLY FUCKING GOSH WHAT A NICE DAY FOR SURFING!

unimpressed2chainz:

if you don’t remember actively wishing for a t-mobile sidekick you aren’t old enough for friendship w/ me 

dinopuncher:

*tips chromosomes* m’tosis

craigslistdad:

and that’s when it came up and swallowed me millionth dollar

craigslistdad:

and that’s when it came up and swallowed me millionth dollar

communistbakery:

tsarbucks:

what do i use to find the diagonal of a shrektangle?

the farquaadratic formula

judymartn:

American Horror Story: Murder House

 A Summary

safaribrowser:

get your game ondrive safe

safaribrowser:

get your game on
drive safe